What Enabled My Congregation to Communicate Better in Moments of Tension
19 min 45 s
Rev. Alisa Dickhoff
Shifting the congregation’s culture from one where conflict is worked through from a place of love, rather than from anger or power;
The pastor must lead by example, modelling healthy communication skills;
Alisa leads us through a personal example of addressing bullying behavior;
Alisa acknowledged that her experience may not be applicable to congregations with more severe relationship tensions and encouraged caution in applying her methods;
She highlights the need for immediate feedback when issues arise to help others understand the impact of their words and actions.
Rev. Alisa Dickhoff is a native of Lexington, South Carolina and now calls Vernon, Connecticut home. She came to New Haven in 2017 to pursue a Master of Divinity at Yale Divinity School, where her sense of call was deepened through study, community life, and a growing commitment to a faith rooted in justice and love.
Ordained in the United Church of Christ, Rev. Dickhoff joined First Congregational Church of Vernon UCC (FCCV) in January 2022 as Associate Pastor and began serving as Senior Pastor in June 2024. She loves FCCV and the wider Vernon community and is grateful to serve an Opening and Affirming congregation known for its welcoming spirit and care for one another. Her ministry is shaped by meaningful worship, honest conversation, and a deep belief that the church is called to show up for the world with compassion and courage.
Rev. Dickhoff is actively involved in the life of the community beyond the church, advocating for justice, inclusion, and housing stability. She serves on the Vernon Fair Rent Commission and is honored to be the Chaplain for the Vernon Fire Department, roles that allow her to walk alongside neighbors, first responders, and families in both ordinary and challenging moments.
Rev. Dickhoff lives in Vernon with her spouse, JD, and their sons, Paul and Judge. She is grateful for the relationships that make Vernon feel like home and is committed to helping the church be a place where all people are known, valued, and welcomed—just as they are.
- Recorded in December 2025
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